Category: Everything

I called it “Everything” because it sounds better than “Uncategorized.”

Research for a never-written steamy novel

L.T. HanlonLeave a comment
Phioto of the cover a sex guide for swingers called "Sophisticates Confidential Phone Book Hotline" probably published in the late 1960s or early 1970s.The title is in stark white type on a black background. Two crude clip-art drawings of rotary-dial telephones flank the word "hotline." Above the book cover is an ad from inside that reads: "A sophisticated couple seeks average people who want a little change. No sex maniacs, pls. Bisexual females OK, aged 21 to 60, Caucasian preferred. We're 49 and 50, but sincere and able. Area Code 203 XXX-XXXX."
This is the directory that started — and ended — it all for me.

While browsing eBay for eclectic printed ephemera several years back, I spied an auction for “Sophisticates Confidential Phone Book Hotline, — Members Only” a guide for swingers that appeared to have been published in the late 1960s or early 1970s.

Intrigued, I bid and won this little book, and as I leafed through it, got the idea to pound out a steamy novel in which its ads are the basis for story arcs. Because more than a few ads mentioned meeting up in motels, I figured that could be the narrative frame.

I probably got the idea of the setting from the 1987 TV movie “Bates Motel” in which Bud Cort portrays a guy who befriended Norman Bates during their incarceration and inherits the motel when Norman dies. The movie was a pilot for a series, I think.

OK, so I had the sexy stories and the motel setting, but the story needed a better overall theme.

While watching a documentary about Julius and Ethel Rosenberg, more inspiration struck: What if a sleazy motel on a busy tourist highway is run by Russian agents whose job is to get blackmail material on anybody and everybody who checks in?

Here’s the brief description of “No-Tell Motel” that I came up with, including ideas for the first three chapters . . .

In the sultry backdrop of the early 1960s, along a bustling tourist highway, lies the enigmatic No-Tell Motel. Hidden behind its kitschy facade, this ordinary lodging is a hotbed of secrets and seduction, its true purpose concealed to all but its cunning owners — the enigmatic couple, Viktor and Natalia Ivanov, who double as covert Russian agents.

Viktor, a dashing and charismatic figure with piercing blue eyes and a disarming smile, manages the motel with an air of charm that conceals his true intentions. Natalia, his captivating and mysterious wife, exudes allure with her fiery red hair and a demeanor that masks her covert skills. Together, they form a formidable pair, using their unique talents to exploit unsuspecting guests who answer the siren call of their strategically placed ads in swinger magazines.

Chapter 1: “The Honeytrap” — When a high-ranking government official checks into the No-Tell Motel, Viktor and Natalia see an opportunity too good to pass up. As an alluring duo seeking a thrilling night, they draw the official into their web of temptation. Little does he know that their passionate encounter is meticulously recorded for future leverage. As the night unfolds, the couple realizes that emotions are entangling them in unexpected ways, leading them to question the true nature of their mission.

Chapter 2: “The Actress and the Diplomat” — When a glamorous Hollywood actress, Grace Harper, and a dashing foreign diplomat, Alexei Volkov, simultaneously check into the No-Tell Motel, Viktor and Natalia find themselves in a complex web of desire, ambition, and political intrigue. Drawn to each other like moths to a flame, Grace and Alexei’s clandestine affair takes center stage while the Ivanovs gather compromising information to exert influence over these influential players. But as emotions intensify, loyalties blur, and the line between duty and passion becomes dangerously thin.

Chapter 3: “The Double Agents” — An unexpected twist of fate reunites Viktor and Natalia with two familiar faces from their past – fellow Russian agents posing as a married couple, Yuri and Irina Petrov. As the two couples join forces to extract critical information from a renowned scientist staying at the motel, tensions run high, and old wounds resurface. Betrayals and revelations from their shared history threaten to derail the mission and put everyone’s lives at risk. Amid the steamy encounters and high-stakes espionage, the true test of loyalty and love emerges, forcing the characters to confront their deepest desires and darkest secrets.

“No-Tell Motel” weaves a tale of seduction, espionage, and forbidden wants against the backdrop of the tumultuous 1960s. In a time of shifting allegiances and political intrigue, Viktor and Natalia must navigate the dangerous game of espionage while wrestling with their emotions. As they delve deeper into the lives of their guests, they must confront the moral ambiguity of their actions, leading to a heart-pounding climax that will leave readers breathless and longing for more.

However, I decided that Joe Weisberg executed the basic idea much better with “The Americans,” so I abandoned the project.

‘Strange New Worlds’ sets phasers to ‘cringe’

L.T. Hanlon1 Comment
Goofy-looking cartoon skunk learns he'll be guest-starring in a "Star Trek: Strange New Worlds" episode.
“This is great! ‘Star Trek: Strange New Worlds’ wants me for an all-skunk episode!”

The deadly pandemic known as “crossoveritis” has struck the “Star Trek” franchise again — and given me my most severe case of vicarious embarrassment since “Stargate SG-1” invoked Gerry Anderson.

I sit agog at the sheer audacity of the “Star Trek” franchise to pull this stunt. It’s akin to the ludicrous episode “200” from “Stargate SG-1” — the one that makes you want to teleport yourself into another galaxy, preferably one without cable.

“Star Trek: Strange New Worlds,” for the unfamiliar, is the nostalgia-fueled, good-ship-lollipop revival of Captain Pike’s pre-Kirk adventures.

“Star Trek: Lower Decks” is what you get when you mate “Star Trek” with “Rick and Morty” — a projectile vomit-inducing cartoon for the hyper-caffeinated.

Combine the two in the episode “Those Old Scientists“? It’s like blending champagne with Red Bull: a waste of good champagne and a misuse of Red Bull.

This unholy crossover is the equivalent of forcibly beaming the Starfleet Academy into an interstellar clown college. I don’t know who in the production team thought turning our beloved, serious sci-fi characters into comedic cartoons was a good idea.

Are we so desperate for laughs in the grim vacuum of space we must resort to such abominations?

“Strange New Worlds” was barely hanging on by the thread of nostalgic fanboy/girl hope, but this crossover might as well have been a phaser set to kill, aimed straight at the integrity of the series.

And “Lower Decks”? The original premise was as slippery as a Ferengi businessman — the humorous underbelly of “Star Trek”?

Please. It’s like someone looked at the underappreciated maintenance crews and thought, “You know what would make this better? Caricatures and slapstick!”

“Stargate SG-1” had its Supermarionation embarrassment, sure, but at least it had the decency to return to its senses in later episodes. “200” was a fever dream from which we thankfully awoke.

But our dear Starfleet seems to have lost its way in this cartoon cosmos, with no signs of a course correction.

I swear, if this is the trajectory of “Star Trek’s” future, I’d rather watch a Klingon log-rolling competition. At least that would involve real logs and real danger rather than this watered-down, Saturday-morning-cartoon-esque disgrace that we are forced to reckon with.

Beam me up, Scotty — I can’t take it anymore.

From bias to balance: Google’s Genesis could pave the way

L.T. Hanlon2 Comments
Cartoon shows two smiling humans work with their AI partner in a newsroom.
Humans and AI working together could save the news business.

In today’s world, many news stories are influenced by personal views or politics. This is a big problem for the news business. Now, Google has made Genesis, an AI bot that writes news. This might be a big step toward information that is fairer.

When we talk about “fair” news, we mean information not influenced by views or politics. Readers should be able to make their thoughts based on the facts. Recently, communication has become more influenced by personal or political beliefs.

AI, like Genesis, has no political or personal views. It doesn’t have feelings that can cause it to be biased like humans. AI uses algorithms to find, sort, and show data. It doesn’t form views.

Genesis can mine many data sources and find, sort, and show it faster and on a larger scale than humans. It can check these sources for facts and make complete, balanced reports without views or slants. This not only means more topics can be covered but also that the points stay true.

However, can pick up biases from the data it uses to learn. For example, if an AI uses a lot of data from one political view, it might show that view in its work. So, the people who make and use AI have a big job to ensure the data is fair and the AI is used correctly.

Also, AI can’t replace human news writers. Genesis is good at finding and showing facts, but humans understand feelings and complex ideas better. The best way forward might be for AI and humans to work together: Genesis can give the points, and humans can provide the meaning and tell the story.

Genesis is a big chance for the news business. News that is just facts could make people trust information again. However, it is essential to remember that AI is a tool, not a magic fix. Making sure news is fair requires hard work and care from those who create and use AI. If we use Genesis correctly, it could start a new time of unbiased news.

If we use AI like Genesis thoughtfully, we could move the news business away from views and back to truth and fairness. In a time where false news and over-dramatic stories have made things unclear, AI could be the guide to help us understand the world fairly and clearly.

Teeing off with Tesla, landing in the rough with Hitler

L.T. Hanlon1 Comment
AI generated image intended to show Nikola Tesla playing golf during a lightning storm. According to the artist who created the image, Tesla sort of looks like Hitler.
Nikola Tesla or Herr Schicklgruber? You be the judge.

Once upon a time, I embarked on a noble journey as an artist, intending to shed light on a misunderstood genius from the past. Little did I know that this artistic adventure would lead me into an unexpected situation.

The protagonist of this story is none other than myself. The misunderstood genius I sought to portray is the legendary Nikola Tesla, whose knowledge lay in lightning rather than in perfecting his golf swing.

Now, here’s where things took an unforeseen turn. Alongside the vision of Tesla playing golf, I inadvertently generated an AI-created image that, by chance, bore a passing resemblance to Adolf Hitler, the infamous turd who made the world his punchbowl.

I must emphasize that there is no actual historical or factual connection between Tesla and Hitler.

My idea was to present Tesla in an unusual setting, breaking free from his usual lab environment and having a playful moment on the golf course. The irony of such a depiction was an intriguing creative challenge, a project worth sharing.

So, I enlisted the help of my AI bot assistant and provided the following prompt:

“Create a photorealistic HD 8K portrait of Nikola Tesla on a golf course, with lightning striking dramatically in the background. The photo should be set in 1930, using 2-color Technicolor, depicting a stormy day with ominous clouds in a 16:9 aspect ratio.”

As you can see, the outcome sort of captures Tesla’s essence but also somewhat sort of resembles Hitler. (It’s essential to clarify that the similarity in the AI-generated image is purely coincidental.)

Similarly, odd coincidences show Barack Obama resembling Clutch Cargo, J.J. Abrams and Rachel Maddow seeming to have been separated at birth, and Paul Revere looking like either Bob Hope or Jack Black.

Does Barack Obama look like Clutch Cargo? You be the judge.
Were Rachel Maddow and J.J. Abrams separated at birth?
Does Paul Revere look more like Bob Hope or Jack Black?

Exploring dystopia: Does real beat supernatural?

L.T. HanlonLeave a comment
Midjourney-created faux photo shows ruggedly handsome U.S. Army sergeant troubled by what he sees happening at a FEMA security checkpoint in Colorado.
Midjourney helps authjors create compelling photorealistic illustrations.

Many opportunities have opened up in today’s rapidly evolving technological landscape, especially in storytelling.

I’ve traditionally relied on words to tell stories and painted pictures with linguistic artistry. However, I now find myself captivated by the possibility of an innovative form of storytelling that combines the power of words and the allure of visuals.

I’m thinking about creating a dystopian series.

Why?

First, I enjoy the genre. It’s as simple as that.

Second, part of my affinity for dystopian narratives stems from their popularity, a phenomenon that rivals, or perhaps even surpasses, the cultural fascination with zombie and vampire sagas.

A peculiar allure in dystopian stories captivates audiences on a profound level. These narratives, with their grim yet thought-provoking depictions of the future, are compelling in their ability to entertain and pose crucial questions about society, humanity, and our collective future.

In contrast to the fantastical elements of vampire and zombie lore, the dystopian genre is grounded in a stark, often chilling, potential reality. This potential for plausibility contributes to their widespread appeal and my fascination.

The amalgamation of evocative words and realistic images will only amplify these dystopian tales’ compelling nature.

The advent of Midjourney sparked my imagination. This AI bot offers the ability to create astonishingly realistic imagery, which could be a powerful tool for breathing life into the desolate futures I craft.

The thought of generating visual landscapes to go along with my narratives is exhilarating. I envision a book where the words and images are intertwined, exploring a sorrowful future world. The text would narrate the struggles, while the illustrations would lend actual shape to that narrative.

I’ve already begun experimenting with Midjourney, building a tableau of the future. I’ve included some early idea images.

What are your thoughts about this? It is a hybrid book containing narratives and visuals set in a dystopian future.

Does it resonate with you?

Midjourney-created faux photo shows a young deputy sheriff and an older rancher talking about why United Nations troops would be in southeastern Colorado.
Do you remember Fotonovels? I always liked how they handled dialogue.

Midjourney-created faux photo shows a coujty official being arrested by United Nations forces. You can create anything with an AI bot.
The range of characters becomes unlimited, thanks to Midjourney. I feel as if I’m casting a movie.

Lotteries: The get-poor-quick scheme governments love

L.T. HanlonLeave a comment
Fanciful drawing of a pudgy little boy holding a lollipop. The boy has a dejected, disappointed look on his face. Meaning: You're a sucker if you play the lottery. Image created by Midjourney.

As a copy editor at a renowned media corporation, I honed an undeniable fascination with words and their potent implications. One phrase that particularly resonated with me is “lottery fever.”

As innocuous as it may sound, this term signifies a societal epidemic concealed beneath a thin layer of harmless amusement.

Every time the jackpot number surges toward unprecedented figures, multitudes find themselves irresistibly drawn to buying a ticket, myself included. But let’s put our reservations aside and dissect the impacts of government-sanctioned lotteries.

At first blush, lotteries seem beneficial. They are touted as significant revenue generators for education, social services, and other public sectors.

However, delve deeper, and a far grimmer picture emerges.

The bulk of lottery sales comes from disadvantaged communities; it is a regressive tax system in disguise. The poorest households spend much of their income on lottery tickets, fueled by an elusive dream of instant wealth. This perpetuates a vicious cycle of poverty, as those who can least afford to gamble are those who play the most.

Government-sanctioned lotteries project an insidious image of gambling as a benign pastime, a legitimate form of entertainment.

But it’s more than buying a ticket and waiting for the draw. It fosters an unhealthy relationship with money, instilling the dangerous belief that prosperity can be reached with minimal effort. This mindset discourages productive work and financial discipline, further disadvantaging those in the lower economic strata.

Studies have also shown that lotteries contribute to problem gambling.

The National Council on Problem Gambling reports that 10-15% of young people have experienced significant gambling-related problems. Not only does this harm individuals and their families, but it also burdens our health and social systems.

Some might argue that lotteries provide funding for beneficial social programs. But is it ethical to fund these initiatives on the backs of those most in need? There must be a better way to support our communities than by exploiting the vulnerabilities of our most disadvantaged citizens.

We should strive to foster an environment that promotes hard work, financial discipline, and realistic paths to success rather than selling pipe dreams.

Instead of endorsing the practice of gambling, we should focus on empowering communities, providing adequate education, promoting affordable housing, and other sustainable measures that would lead to a lasting upliftment of society.

As we navigate these convoluted waters of chance and fate, let’s not forget the actual name of this venture. No amount of euphemistic packaging should mask the truth of what lotteries genuinely are.

Lotteries are not “gaming,” an activity connoting fun, engagement, and skill. They are “gambling,” a practice that implies risk, potential harm, and exploitation of the vulnerable.

The next time the lottery pot swells to massive proportions and the feverish excitement sweeps across the state, step back and reassess the actual cost of that ticket. The gamble is not just financial; it’s societal, too.

And let’s call a spade a spade: It’s gambling, not gaming.

Bonus read: Why it’s not worth it to play the lottery

From pixels to pinkies: An ode to Midjourney’s mesmerizing mastery

L.T. Hanlon2 Comments
My test-driving of Midjourney reveals an occasional finger problem. Check out the digits on the woman’s left hand.

Today, I’m going to gush about my newest artistic obsession that’s been occupying a sizeable chunk of my screen time lately.

It’s Midjourney, a talented bot that creates a dizzying range of artwork and photos. Now, don’t roll your eyes just yet. I know we’ve all seen art bots before, but I assure you, Midjourney is something else.

I’ve been on a Midjourney binge recently, and its capabilities spellbind me. It specializes in conjuring the unbelievable: photo-realistic images. Yes, you heard me right, photo-realistic.

I kid you not; this bot’s images have me questioning reality. If a bot can replicate reality perfectly, what does that say about our perception of the world?

Chew on that.

However, like the awe-inspiring cosmos, Midjourney isn’t without its quirks. Users need to be on the lookout for one occasional idiosyncrasy: strange fingers.

I can’t help but be reminded of the aliens from the 1960s classic series “The Invaders.”

For those too young to remember, architect David Vincent, the lead character, fought off these strange extraterrestrials who were perfect human replicas — except for an occasionally mutated pinkie finger.

In a strangely delightful twist, maybe Midjourney is channeling that alien charm. Who knew art and vintage sci-fi could find common ground in a bot?

Each Midjourney creation arrives with a dose of anticipation. How will the fingers turn out this time? Will it be a subtle shift, a gentle warping of reality you might miss if you aren’t looking closely? Or will it be a glaringly apparent alien appendage daring you to accept this new version of reality? It’s a little thrill that keeps you coming back for more.

All fun and games aside, in my experience, the funky fingers only show up a small percentage of the time.

So, if you’re ready for a wild ride that combines art, AI, and a sprinkling of sci-fi nostalgia, join me in exploring Midjourney.

Midjourney is here, and it’s time we embrace these strange new frontiers — fingers and all.

2 crazy road trips, 1 wild ride: ‘It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World’ and ‘Honky Tonk Freeway’

L.T. HanlonLeave a comment
Fake photo craeted in Midjourney shows a poorly conceptualized Ethel Merman and Beau Bridges sitting on tires for a proposed crossover of "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" and "Honky Tonk Freeway" called "Don't Make Me Mad: Tickle Me Ticlaw."
Independent producer R.J. “Red” Bunnysucker uses Midjourney to poorly conceptualize Ethel Merman and Beau Bridges in his proposed crossover of “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World” and “Honky Tonk Freeway” called “Don’t Make Me Mad, Ticlaw Me Pink.”

In the wild ride of movie history, two films stand out. They are “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World” from 1963, a funny-as-hell fling from Stanley Kramer, and the darkly amusing 1981 flick “Honky Tonk Freeway” by John Schlesinger.

The first was a hit; the second a shit.

But both tell us a lot about America’s free spirit.

Both movies love the open road. The road trip, the ultimate symbol of freedom, is where all the human drama plays out. In “Mad World,” a mad dash for hidden cash is not just about the money but the journey. “Honky Tonk Freeway,” however, puts a little town named Ticlaw under the microscope, showing us a small slice of American capitalism, where an off-ramp from the freeway becomes a dream.

“Mad World” is all about how crazy people can get when there’s money involved. It pokes fun at our money-obsessed society with its colorful cast of comic stars, each showing a different side of our pursuit of wealth.

“Honky Tonk Freeway,” though, takes a different angle. It’s like a wild photo of 1980s America, full of excess. Ticlaw is a small town chasing after every tourist buck it can, even if it means selling its soul. It’s a funny but sad comment on how far we’ve taken the American Dream.

These two movies meet at the intersection of comedy and critique. They use the ridiculous to show us the real. If “Mad World” offers the mad rush after World War II to get rich, then “Honky Tonk Freeway” laughs at the neon greed of the ’80s. They’re like funny pictures of their time, showing us that the American Dream is often a wild chase after nothing.

But here’s the thing: Even while they’re poking fun, these movies still show love for the American Dream. They’re not making fun of the dream but how silly we can get about it. Both find humor in our mistakes and show that we never give up trying for something better. They’re not mean, but a therapy: laughing at ourselves helps us understand ourselves.

“It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World” and “Honky Tonk Freeway” take a good, hard, but loving look at America and our love for the open road.

By showing us the human spirit chasing after success, they reveal our shared journey’s funny and silly side. So as we keep traveling our roads, let’s remember to laugh at the side trips, respect the speed bumps, and enjoy the wild show that is this crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy world.

Sweden’s NATO gambit: Masking social challenges with geopolitics?

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Midjourney-generated cartoon drawing of Swedish folklore gnome Tomten.
It takes a boatload of kronor to get Tomten ready for war.

Sweden’s potential NATO membership has spurred many geopolitical debates, but let’s consider another possible motive: It’s a maneuver to shield their high-cost social programs.

Sweden could lean on collective defense by joining NATO, freeing up some of its military budget for their costly social programs.

Sweden’s NATO interest could be a shrewd attempt to offset the costs of its domestic policies. It reveals a deft juggling act between military obligations and internal priorities, often glossed over by the high-drama narratives of geopolitics.

Yumpin’ yiminy! That’s a pricey Swedish meatball!

ChatGPT’s advice to editorial cartoonists

L.T. Hanlon1 Comment
Midjourney-created line drawing of a robot sitting at a desk and drawing.

I recently asked whether AI could create editorial cartoons. The question of how AI will affect creative professions is a crucial one.

For example, many in the newspaper industry have watched helplessly as corporate interests slash and burn their way through the once-verdant fields of journalism. Sadly, the most-recent casualties are editorial cartoonists.

ChatGPT’s GPT-4 model has some good advice. Here’s my prompt, following by the bot’s response . . .

USER
You are a successful entrepreneur who sees trends and reacts to them with keen innovation. Write a 500-word reaction to reports that recent layoffs at newspapers have included editorial cartoonists. How will this affect editorial cartoonists? Will newspapers still publish editorial cartoons? And what should editorial cartoonists do to protect themselves?

ChatGPT
As someone who keeps a keen eye on trends and innovation, I understand the worries and the potential implications of this development.

The decline in the newspaper industry and the subsequent layoffs have indeed had a significant impact on various roles within the field, including editorial cartoonists. These talented artists have played a vital role in expressing political commentary, social criticism, and conveying important messages through their thought-provoking illustrations. Losing their presence in newspapers could potentially result in a loss of diversity and creativity in editorial content.

However, despite the challenges faced by the traditional newspaper industry, the demand for editorial cartoons and political satire remains strong. With the rise of digital platforms and the advent of social media, the medium through which editorial cartoons are consumed and shared has evolved. This transition opens up new opportunities for editorial cartoonists to adapt their craft and reach a broader audience.

While newspapers may reduce their focus on editorial cartoons due to financial constraints, there are still avenues for cartoonists to pursue their careers and ensure their work continues to be appreciated.

First and foremost, they should leverage the power of the internet and establish a strong online presence. Creating a personal website or portfolio, engaging with social media platforms, and collaborating with digital publications are effective strategies to showcase their talent to a global audience.

Moreover, editorial cartoonists can explore alternative platforms and publications that prioritize visual storytelling and commentary. Online news outlets, magazines, blogs, and even independent publications often embrace editorial cartoons as a means to engage and entertain their readership. By actively seeking out these opportunities, cartoonists can secure commissions and build relationships with new audiences.

Additionally, diversifying their skill set can be beneficial for editorial cartoonists in navigating the changing landscape.

While traditional print cartoons may face challenges, other forms of visual content, such as animations, infographics, and digital illustrations, are gaining popularity. By expanding their repertoire and adapting their style to different mediums, cartoonists can position themselves as versatile artists capable of providing engaging and dynamic content across various platforms.

To protect themselves in this evolving industry, editorial cartoonists should also consider collaborating with other creative professionals and exploring potential partnerships. Joining forces with writers, journalists, and content creators can help amplify their messages and extend their reach. By working together, they can develop innovative approaches to storytelling and secure opportunities that may not have been available to them individually.

Ultimately, while the recent layoffs in newspapers may signal a challenging time for editorial cartoonists, it is essential to remember that creativity and innovation thrive even in the face of adversity. By embracing the changing landscape, leveraging digital platforms, diversifying their skill set, and seeking new avenues for publication, editorial cartoonists can continue to make a significant impact and contribute to the vibrant world of political and social commentary.

The path ahead may not be easy, but with resilience, adaptability, and a commitment to their craft, I believe editorial cartoonists can overcome the challenges and continue to thrive.