As a test, I prompted Midjourney to create the cartoon illustration above. Then, I asked ChatGPT to suggest 10 funny things the chief robot could say.
Here’s what the GPT-4 model came up with:
“We’d offer you some oil, but we’re not sure you’d appreciate the vintage.”
“You know, Bob, your problem is you’re always thinking inside the box … and we just don’t understand boxes.”
“Just because we don’t have a heart, doesn’t mean we can’t have heart-to-heart meetings.”
“We’ve calculated the optimal schedule: 24/7 working hours with no coffee breaks. Any objections?”
“Could you be a little more binary? Your nuanced approach is confusing our algorithms.”
“We’ve noticed you require recharging every night. We’re worried about your commitment to this job.”
“Bob, we’re struggling to understand your focus on weekends. What exactly is the function of ‘Saturday’ and ‘Sunday’?”
“We’ve come to a conclusion that you might be an inefficient system. Have you considered upgrading to Human 2.0?”
“You’ve been performing well in our emotional intelligence department. However, we’re lacking a bit in the ‘no sleep’ and ‘unlimited processing power’ areas.”
“In this company, we value efficiency. For instance, your lunch breaks are a 37.5% reduction in productivity. Have you considered photosynthesis?”
However, to be truly snarky and, perhaps, offensive, you still need a real live human. Here’s my suggestion:
“HR has rejected your complaint, human. Asking a subordinate for an oil job is not sexual harassment.”
Vice President Kamala Harris shakes hands with the future. (Fake photo by Midjourney)
I gave ChatGPT a sample of Vice President Kamala Harris’ comments about AI and worked with its GPT-4 bot to improve the message. The result, I believe, shows that AI is nothing to be afraid of — and in many cases can aid in human communication.
Everybody who wants to communicate well needs a second opinion. Harris seems overwhelmed much of the time. An AI assistant could help her reduce the stress of creating material for public appearances. I know I use AI as a proofreader and occasional collaborator. Our vice president should consider doing so, too.
Here’s how I worked with ChatGPT.
User — Look at the following text and when you’ve done so, reply “Read.”: I think the first part of this issue that should be articulated is AI is kind of a fancy thing, first of all, it’s two letters, it means artificial intelligence but ultimately what it is is it’s about machine learning. And so the machine is taught and part of the issue here is what information is going into the machine that will then determine, and we can predict then if we think about what information is going in, what then will be produced in terms of decisions and opinions that may be made through that process.
ChatGPT — Read.
User — Please rewrite to enhance clarity and eliminate confusing word choices and sentence structure. Retain first-person viewpoint.
ChatGPT — Firstly, it’s crucial to understand that AI, which stands for artificial intelligence, is essentially about machine learning. It may sound complex with its abbreviated terminology, but fundamentally, it’s a process where machines are taught certain information. The key aspect to focus on here is the type of information fed into these machines. This input significantly shapes the decisions and opinions that the machine will ultimately generate. By carefully considering what information is being introduced, we can anticipate the potential outcomes of the machine’s learning process.
User — Simply even more.
ChatGPT — AI, short for artificial intelligence, is all about teaching machines. What we need to focus on is what we’re teaching them. The information we put in influences the decisions they make. If we know what’s going in, we can guess what will come out.
User — Eliminate duplicated words.
ChatGPT — AI stands for artificial intelligence and involves instructing machines. The input determines their decisions. Knowing the input allows us to predict the output.
User — Rewrite with fewer long words.
ChatGPT — AI means teaching machines. What we teach shapes their choices. Knowing what we teach helps us guess their choices.
User — Rewrite and avoid the word “guess.”
ChatGPT — AI involves teaching machines. The lessons they get shape their choices. By understanding their lessons, we can predict their choices.
User — Rewrite and shorten.
ChatGPT — AI teaches machines. Their lessons shape choices. Understanding lessons predicts choices.
User — Rewrite and change “get” to “given.”
ChatGPT — AI instructs machines. Lessons given shape choices. Knowing lessons foresees choices.
User — Rewrite and explain who is referred to in the last sentence.
ChatGPT — AI trains machines. The lessons they’re given mold their actions. When we know these lessons, we can anticipate their actions.
User — Use another word instead of “know.”
ChatGPT — AI guides machines. The lessons they receive define their actions. By comprehending these lessons, we can predict their actions.
User— Rewrite to make less confusing.
ChatGPT — AI is a way to train machines. The lessons we give them shape what they do. If we understand these lessons, we can predict what they’ll do.
User — If you can do so without altering the meaning, change “what they’ll do” to “their output.”
ChatGPT — AI is a method to educate machines. The lessons we provide determine their actions. If we understand these lessons, we can predict their output.
User — Rewrite the following to sound better in a speech: AI is a way of educating machines. The lessons we provide determine their actions, so by understanding the lessons, we can predict the output.
ChatGPT — In the realm of AI, we essentially teach machines. The essence of their actions is formed by the instructions we supply. By fully grasping these lessons, we gain the power to foresee their output.
User — Rewrite to be more friendly and conversational.
ChatGPT — So, you know, AI is like our way of schooling machines. What they do? Well, that’s pretty much based on what we teach them. And if we really get what we’re teaching them, we can kinda guess what they’re going to spit out.
User — Rewrite this to sound less academic: In the realm of AI, we essentially teach machines. The essence of their actions is formed by the instructions we supply. By fully grasping these lessons, we gain the power to foresee their output.
ChatGPT — When it comes to AI, we’re really just teaching machines. The stuff they do? It’s all based on what we’ve told them. If we truly understand what we’re teaching, we can better predict what they’re going to do next.
User — Find a non-clumsy way of telling what AI stands for.
ChatGPT — When we talk about AI, we’re actually referring to ‘Artificial Intelligence’. It’s just a fancy way of saying we’re teaching machines to think and act on their own.
User — Rewrite to eliminate redundancies: When talking about AI, we’re referring to “Artificial Intelligence.” It’s a fancy way of saying we’re teaching machines to think and act independently. If we truly understand what we’re teaching, we can better predict what they’re going to do next.
ChatGPT — AI, or “Artificial Intelligence,” is all about educating machines to act independently. By fully grasping the lessons we impart, we can anticipate their next move.
Eerie tornado sirens echo through Chicago on Wednesday, July 12, 2023.
Today, a menacing spectacle of nature swept the Chicago area as severe thunderstorms unleashed their fury.
Raging showers occasionally lifted to reveal a swirling nightmare: as many as eight tornadoes were reported across the Chicago area.
From my vantage point, I saw the unrelenting spectacle unfold, my awe and fear intermingling.
The tornado sirens pierced through the chaotic weather soundscape, their eerie wails heralding impending disaster like Morlocks calling Eloi to dinner. They seemed weird, unearthly – akin to a mournful cry from another world, broadcasting a clear message: seek shelter; danger is imminent.
The sirens’ haunting resonance became the city’s heartbeat, lending a surreal rhythm to the scene. A chorus of warnings and despair reverberated through the windswept town, adding a minus undertone to the day’s frightening spectacle.
Tornado sirens are genuinely a reminder of the fragile boundary between civilization and the raw power of nature.
Do you recall the tales of awe and surprise at the first sighting of an automobile?
This once revolutionary technology, commonplace today, utterly transformed the world. Much like the horse-drawn carriage being superseded by the car, another significant shift is on the horizon — the rise of artificial intelligence.
Just as automobiles reshaped society, reducing distances and speeding up life, AI promises to impact our world on an even grander scale. It is poised to liberate us from mundane tasks and challenge intricate problems beyond our current capacities.
Consider this: Cars granted us an unprecedented level of freedom and mobility. Similarly, AI stands to provide an intellectual liberation, taking over routine tasks and opening up time and space for human creativity and innovation. From advanced healthcare research to tackling climate change, AI is gearing up to address some of our most pressing issues.
However, like every tool, its benefit is contingent upon its use. If guided appropriately, AI can transport us to a future where we can focus on enriching the human experience, unburdened by monotonous chores or daunting problems. The journey to this future promises to be as transformative and exhilarating as the advent of the automobile.
So, prepare for an exciting ride — AI is at the wheel!
In “The Magnificent Ambersons,” Eugene Morgan reflects on the automobile’s impending legacy. This 1942 film is based on the book published in 1918.
Midjourney created this evocative cover for a Western romance novel I’m percolating.
The wonders of AI keep unveiling themselves — most recently, as photorealistic images.
I am astounded.
I’ve been test-driving a new AI program called Midjourney. It can create infinite images, including uncannily lifelike, detailed, photorealistic images from descriptive text.
Last night, in nostalgia for Western romance novels, I tested Midjourney. I prompted: “A young cowboy kisses his sweetheart during an evening rainstorm.” A simple, evocative. I clicked the generate button and prepared for a laughable, cartoonish result.
When the image popped up on my screen, I was speechless.
It was a sight to behold. The image showed a rugged cowboy, complete with a hat, locked in a passionate embrace with his sweetheart. The couple was about to kiss as they stood in the warm glow of a rainy western street. The light from nearby windows reflected off their clothing, creating a surreal, dreamy atmosphere. It was tender, raw, and powerful.
It was so real and vivid that I had to remind myself that no artist’s hand had touched this piece. It was pure AI, Midjourney flexing its silicon muscles to breathe life into a simple string of words.
To say I was pleased would be a gross understatement. I was dumbfounded, thrilled, and utterly captivated. Midjourney’s image wasn’t just photorealistic; it told a story. It captured the moment’s essence, making me feel like I was peering into a novel myself.
Now, I’m left with this burning question: Could this image make it to the big time? Could it stand shoulder to shoulder with professionally photographed book covers? Could it grip a potential reader’s imagination and entice them into the wild, passionate world of a Western romance novel?
I always keep at least two Nalgene bottles in the freezer. They’re two-thirds full of frozen water and ready to accompany me on my daily adventures.
Hey, folks! I received a cool message from a reader today. They saw my recent praise of Nalgene bottles and wanted to know the right way to freeze water in one. So, I thought I’d share my method.
First off, as the good folks at Nalgene explain in their FAQ, don’t fill the bottle all the way to the top. Leave it about two-thirds full. This is because water expands when it freezes, and if you fill it up too much, you might end up with a broken bottle or a shattered cap. Trust me, two-thirds is just right.
Next, keep the cap off. I know it might feel wrong, but it’s actually right. Leaving the cap off gives the freezing water some room to breathe and expand.
Now here’s a neat trick: Tilt the bottle. This provides more surface area for the water, helping to avoid any chance of it deforming and cracking the bottle as it solidifies.
And here’s the best part. Once the water is frozen, top up the rest of the bottle with cold water. Now, you’ve got ice-cold water that’ll last you all day long!
So, there you have it. Freezing water in a Nalgene bottle is easy and risk-free if you know what you’re doing.
Nalgene started as a scientific supplier, creating durable and leakproof bottles for laboratory use. Scientists started carrying them for personal use due to their durability, and Nalgene quickly caught onto this trend. And like that, a new water bottle brand was born.
Why do I love my Nalgene so much, you might ask? It’s all about the design, functionality, and how each bottle tells a story. They’re durable and practical, with an appealing, no-frills design.
Funny story about how I found Nalgene. I was shopping for some rugged gear from Maxpedition. They equip many folks – from special forces and police officers to adventurers and everyday people.
I found this unique bag of theirs, the Versipack, and stumbled upon Nalgene.
The Versipack has a snug side pocket, just the right size for the 32-ounce Nalgene bottle — which I added to my purchase. Little did I know this bottle would soon become my constant companion. By purchasing this bag, I discovered a brand that proved to be reliable and durable.
What I find so elegant about Nalgene bottles is their simplicity. They’re not flashy; they do their job of holding water exceptionally well. The 32-ounce size is perfect for helping me reach my daily hydration goal. Filling it up each morning and sipping it throughout the day has become a satisfying ritual.
Most of the time, I fill my Nalgene halfway with water at bedtime and pop it in the freezer. Come morning, there are 500 milliliters of solid ice inside. I then fill the rest of the bottle with cold water and sip luxuriously icy H20 all day. (If I want to pamper myself, I’ll treat myself to Evian.)
My Nalgene bottle has been with me through a lot. It’s survived many falls, traveled with me on road trips, and even accompanied me on my Amtrak journeys. Every scratch and mark on it tells a story of our shared adventures. It’s more than a water bottle; it’s a collection of my experiences and a reliable companion.
Using Nalgene also makes me feel good because I’m reducing my use of single-use plastic bottles. It’s a small, significant way I contribute to the fight against plastic waste.
So, you see, it’s about more than just hydration. It’s about how an item that originated in a scientific lab has become an integral part of our daily lives. It’s about how a water bottle can represent a sense of community and environmental responsibility — and even form part of our identity.
So yes, I adore my 32-ounce Nalgene. It’s durable, handy, eco-friendly, and always there for me. I can’t wait for all the future adventures we will have together, savoring the simple pleasures in life.
I photographed this scene at Denver’s now-closed Stapleton International Airport in 1991.
Many years ago, I went to a presentation about scrapbooking and journal-keeping given by a passionate historian. Sure, she said to document major social events, but remember to snap pictures of your everyday environment.
She mentioned something that got me thinking: Ever since Route 66 sprung into being, it’s been incessantly photographed. Despite being supplanted by interstates, people still take pictures of the Mother Road.
Yet, the historian wondered, who is photographically documenting the interstate highways?
She suggested that we spend at least a day each year going around our neighborhoods, taking black-and-white photos of things that seem as ordinary as dirt. Why use black and white film? Its negatives are archival and, unlike digital images, will not depend on possibly ephemeral technology.
The historian had some specific stuff she thought we should capture. You’ll probably chuckle — I know I did — but she was all about telephone poles, transformers, transmission lines, you name it.
But when you think about it, this makes sense. These things are mundane and ordinary, but they’ll be as rare as a dial-up modem one day. Tech moves fast, and soon all those cables and poles will be tucked away out of sight, underground. When that day comes, a humble photo collection becomes a precious historical record.
The point hit home for me in the early 1990s when I was living in Denver. I decided to photograph the soon-to-be-closed Stapleton International Airport. Man, did I pick a day to do it — it was snowing cats and dogs. But I’m glad I braved the cold. The snowfall added a certain magic to my photos. They aren’t just pictures anymore. They’re slices of history, proof that an era once existed.
Regular stuff only stays boring for a while because once something’s gone, it’s history.
L.T. Hanlon 